Friday 7-4-08 4:20pm
The 4th of July! Im missing my big family and the cookouts today. I wish I was in Fairhope, listening to the pops play by the bluff. I cooked lunch today- hamburgers on the grill, homemade (or is it boatmade) bread for a bun toasted with butter. I craved lettuce and tomato! And Cheese! Oh baby! Cheese!
In a few minutes I'll start cooking supper. Im thinking pasta with diced tomatoes (from a can...argh) and olive oil. My chocolate has been raided many times since last night. David said that he hate all his chocolate at once, and didnt regret it at all. That sounded like a great idea, because the one square a day was really pissing me off. Just enough to make you want more really bad; it wasnt satisfying at all. Its definitely not going to make it anywhere close to the Azores. The winds died to nothing during my watch, so we socked the spinnaker and went for a swim. The water wasnt nearly as cold as it felt from the bucket, bt it was wonderfully relaxing to just float around for a few hours. What wasnt relaxing were all the flashbacks that I kept having to all the shark documentaries that I watched as a kid. Dr. Eugene Clark and the part where they lower the speaker into the sea and it transmits sounds of thrashing about. The sharks drastically increase, attracted to the sound. I would dive in and picture a seven gilled toothy thing jerking his head around in my direction.
So this is the eighth day. Not much progress at all today. But then Im not so anxious, and am somewhat at peace with being confined to this boat for another two weeks. Ive been dreaming of going to the hunting camp and having a cookout. A Brian style cookout, where we eat 50 chicken quarters and listen to old country music. Where theres no such thing as a hurry.
Being around friends and family is the best thing in life. The most beautiful and wonderful things dont carry the same splendour if you have no one to share them with. This trip is a building of my character, hopefully. I long to get on the road of productivity, especially for my Creator. I long more intensely than I long for winter and cool mountains. Rocky rivers running through tall Poplars and evergreens. Campsites away from all the city noise and pollution, and waking up to a pristine sunrise shared with the people I love. No NASCAR, no Jimmy Buffet. But without those two, how would Patience ever come about? And supposedly, there is something to appreciate in everything that someone else likes. That may be a stretch of what Sheldon meant in ''A Severe Mercy'', but it makes the NASCAR and Buffet more bearable. I sure like the idea of a cheeseburger in paradise!
6:43pm- Im stuffed from what I cooked. Pasta noodles, canned tomatoes with garlic and onions, cubed chicken breast and olive oil. It was ok..my spaghetti is usually lots better.
Im about to take a nap before my 9p-12am watch. Sleep is as erratic as I think it could be, the only consistency being our 6 hours off between shifts. But that never means 6 hours of sleep. Usually more 2 or 3, but tonight Ive got the 9p-12am and a 6 hour break until 6am, so I'll actually get almost 5 hours! If I can fall asleep, ha. Its really hot during the day, and the cabin doesnt cool off until after midnight, usually. Im probably going to shave my head soon, to help with the heat as much as for something to do. I havent been able to read as much as I was planning to. I just finished ''A Severe Mercy'' before Bermuda, and now Im a few chapters into ''Whats So Great About Christianity''. Andy gave it to me, and Ive really been enjoying so far, but I find it hard to focus my mind as intensely as I would like in order to process everything as a whole. I have trouble with only picking up the major points and missing out on the facts and figures that he gives- well, not missing out, just not retaining the info like I want to.
The diesel just clanked to life. No wind enough to fill the spinnaker- the only sail that weve had up for the past two days- so now we motor along at 2-3knots. The rocking of the boat at least triples when we are under motor power, because the sails help to control the movement of the boat. Its a drastic difference between the fuming clank clatter of the diesel throwing you from side to side, and the clean smooth silence of the sails. I say smooth completely in a relative sense, for compared to land Im on a perpetual pogo stick that is stuck on a roller coaster, being slapped around by a tornado.
Im fully into my previously rationed chocolate, and couldnt be happier with that. Im always putting silly restrictions on myself- one square of chocolate per day, dont turn on your truck's a/c for 5 miles, eat your orange one wedge every 15 minutes...like that but I forget the others. I do it often, and its very frustrating. Most of the self imposed restrictions are self denial in some way. In fact, most all that I can think of are that. Why do I do this? Most every time whatever I am restricting myself from is some sort of enjoyment or comfort, but is never immoral and usually isnt unhealthy (not counting my current chocolate binge) and I find that throwing off these odd restrictions leads to a more peaceful state of mind. Otherwise Im constantly arguing with myself about meeting some standard that doesnt matter. How odd the mind! Im looking forward to the day that my conscious is tied to my soul rather then my body. Im sure a better understanding of all this, and a de-cluttered train of thought will come as a given.
No comments:
Post a Comment